The Journey So Far...

The Journey So Far...

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Day 0

I am inspired. I am inspired by the people that have lost almost as much weight as I currently weigh. I am going to post here, every day hopefully. I have to get through this. I am 26 years old. I am 5'7, and I weigh 417lbs. Wow, it actually hurts to be honest here. I have tried so many things. Low calorie, low carb, weight watchers, jenny craig, slim fast, you name it, I've been there. I have come to a point in my life where I KNOW that something has to happen. I'm either going to continue on the way that I am and die, or I am going to heal myself. Every step of this will be hard. I have no delusions about that. I am going to have to heal my body and my mind. My emotions, my expectations, my self image, and my world views. None of these things can stay the same anymore. My entire life has been on hold since I was 17 because I cant get past this weight, and as I wait for myself to get on top of it and swim past it, its just getting worse and worse. I want to be here when I am 70 with my husband puttering around at my side. I want children, I want many many children. My body will give me nothing. I feel like a sappling planted in red clay.

I dont have a scale to weigh myself with, so you will just have to bare with me while I get under 400lbs, which is what my scale weighs up to, and its a digital, so I expect nothing concrete until I get down to 349 as my mothers scale weighs up to 350.

Day 1 is tomorrow!