This year has been so stressful. I thought my brother was dead, and he isn't, but I spent months waiting for that call. Our money situation is so tight that when I check my bank account I get butterflies in my stomach. I have felt like the fabric of my universe was coming undone for a while now, and the ONLY thing I feel like I can control is this. I am so invested in this, and honestly sometimes it feels like I don't have enough energy for anything else and I am proud of myself for just getting through the day on plan.
I have trouble seeing my progress and I am really hard on myself, though I am trying to be more kind. I take pictures constantly in the hope that they will bolster me to keep going.
Tonight I cried about so many things, but one of them was this. Good night guys. See you next week.
"Third Eye" Florence & the Machine
An original lifeline,
original lifeline,
An original lifeline,
original lifeline.
Don't make a shadow of yourself,
always shutting out the light.
Caught in your own creation.
Look up, look up!
It tore you open
And oh, how much!
'Cause there's a hole where your heart lies
and I can see it with my third eye.
And oh my touch is madness
You come away, you don't know how
An original lifeline,
original lifeline,
An original lifeline,
original lifeline.
Hey, look up!
You don't have to be a ghost,
here amongst the living.
You are flesh and blood!
And you deserve to be loved and you deserve what you are given.
And oh, how much!
'Cause there's a hole where your heart lies
and I can see it with my third eye.
And oh my touch is madness
You come away, you don't know how.
An original lifeline,
original lifeline,
An original lifeline,
original lifeline.
'Cause there's a hole where your heart lies
and I can see it with my third eye.
And oh my touch is madness
You come away, you don't know how.
An original lifeline,
original lifeline,
An original lifeline,
original lifeline.
Could you pay it as a tribute?
The only thing you let hold you
Wear it now on the mantle
Always there to remind you
Would you pay it as a tribute?
The only thing you let hold you
Wear it now on the mantle
Always there to remind you
I'm the same, I'm the same
I'm trying to change.
I'm the same, I'm the same
I'm trying to change.
I'm the same, I'm the same
I'm trying to change!
'Cause there's a hole where your heart lies
and I can see it with my third eye.
And oh my touch is madness
You come away, you don't know how.
An original lifeline,
original lifeline,
An original lifeline,
original lifeline.
I'm the same, I'm the same
I'm trying to change.
I'm the same, I'm the same
I'm trying to change.
I'm the same, I'm the same
I'm trying to change -
Original lifeline...
2 comments:
Came across your blog recently and I've been reading a few of your more recent past posts. Congratulations on your tremendous loss! The weight loss definitely shows in those pictures! It's not easy to do and you've done fantastic! You should be very proud of yourself! I can relate when you say you can't see your progress since I've been feeling like that lately. I just keep reminding myself that it will show eventually. Have a wonderful week!
Thanks so much for reading. I think it helps to know other people can see the ins and outs of what we're going through.
It will show! One thing that I have learned is that the scale pays up eventually no matter what as long as you keep going, and the mirror will too.
I'm trying to get back into blogging because it helped me so much before. Every active blog like yours keeps me going!
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