The Journey So Far...

The Journey So Far...

Friday, June 25, 2010

Day 290

"What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?"

That is actually a pretty moving question for me. I've been thinking along those lines a lot lately. What would I attempt if I was not fat? So many things. I have dreams that I've let go of and doors I've allowed to close over the years because I didn't (and perhaps still don't, not yet) have the confidence to fight for myself. This has been true in everything, even weight loss until now. Dieting is multifaceted. You think its simple and straight forward, and it is. Recently on facebook one of my cousins asked me for my "secret" because she needed to lose about 100lbs too. There isn't one! I realized then that the reason for my success, especially over the mental hurdles, goes back to the root of the question again. It isn't that I know the future, its that I know my life depends on me getting on the ball and losing this weight. So, I can not fail. Literally. So weight loss is simple, but people aren't. We are complicated, and sometimes deluded creatures. We get in the habit of telling ourselves what we want to hear even when we are hurting ourselves by doing so. I can lose weight whenever I want to. It can wait. I'm just too busy. It's too hard. I'm fine. This diet doesn't work. It's not fair. I'm just taking a break. There is no secret. Weight loss is hard, and transforming yourself on the outside takes transforming yourself on the inside too, and ladies and gentlemen, that is a long road. One we may never be finished. The weight will come off, but then I have to live. The reward is the long road. Maybe I will never get the dreams and opportunities back that I've lost, but I'm clearing the way for the rest of my life.

Today was incredibly active.

I took Chad to work before going to the gym (Woo! Third time this week!) and getting in an extra hour on the elliptical. Then I swam (fun swimming, not really work) for about an hour and a half. Plus today was karaoke, so I'm pretty proud of myself.

Dinner was iffy because I used regular sausage. OUCH 39.5 points for 14oz. Next time I am using chicken, or turkey sausage. Lesson learned!

1 arnolds sand thin: 1
1 serving jam: 1
1/2 serving nutella: 3
1 grilled chicken sandwich: 6
w/ honey mustard: 2
1 small fruit cup: 1
3 waffle fries: 1
1 yogurt parfait: 4
1 serving dirty rice casserole (so many points because I prepared it using sausage, full fat, oops.): 13
1 serving pasta w sauce: 6


Patsy said...

The sad fact is, most people want results with little or no effort... But, it's the hard work that makes the rewards mean so much more! :o)

Raegun said...

What a great question. I need to start asking myself this question more often! You know, when I started my latest "diet" the hardest part was not being afraid to fail...just shifting my mindset to think about it not as a diet but a real change to how I wanted to live my life. It's been very freeing.

Dreidl said...

Love your post today. It really spoke to me.
The biggest hurdle truly isn't the diet it is the mental struggle that we go through each and every day as part of this journey. Congratulations on achieving this much. I truly understand how hard it is. I am 20 pounds down with 150(at least) to go and the hardest days are those where I struggle with mood and motivation. The food is easy, the rest not so much!
Keep it going, there are so many who you are helping along this road.

bloojay said...

So much wisdom packed into just a simply post. I have been learning these lessons and struggling with the same stuff you have... I've also realized, there is no "secret," there is no "diet that works;" there is only me and changing my lifestyle and sticking to it. They almost all work as long as they're fairly healthy... and as long as I keep using them as they don't work by themselves. It is hard, but I think the hardest thing for a lot of overweight people is getting the "secret" and the "fast" and the "temporary diet" and the "miracle products" out of their heads and to just get to changing their habits to better ones.

Sue said...

You are doing so well! Keep up with all the exercise...that is so hard for me to get into, because I am so large, and it is very uncomfortable. But you are an inspiration! :)