Day 26

I went to Weight Watchers today even though I knew I was going to gain. I didn't gain though, I lost .2lbs. Could I have done better? Absolutely. My food this past week was sub par to say the least. I was within my points some of the time, but I was having a really hard time staying in control. I don't feel bad about it though. I want to lose weight but I am trying not to beat myself up for every gain or less than super significant loss. A loss is a loss.

After the meeting I walked down to this little pizza parlor where my friends were waiting for my meeting to be over (I was running late and didn't have time to drop everyone off before I went to WW). I didn't eat there because my friends were almost done, and I wanted to go home and count my points but this place was pretty cool. Whole wheat pizza crust, really healthy and unique pizza toppings like eggplant, and sprouts and all homemade, down to the sauce. If I were going to eat pizza it would totally be there!

I'm telling you all of this because while I was sitting at the table watching my friend feed her one year old eggplant pizza, another member of my Weight Watchers meeting came in. She met my eyes and I could see her guilt, and maybe some embarrassment like I had caught her doing something wrong. I felt bad for her because I used to feel that way. Like I was doing something wrong for eating food that I liked. Even tonight I felt a twinge of something unsavory poking around in my brain as I walked down to the pizza place. What will they think when they see me leaving the meeting to go into a pizza place? Almost instantly though I realized that I am accountable only to myself. I can have pizza on Weight Watchers. The issue isn't the food itself, but the choices I make concerning it. Who cares what the other Weight Watchers members think when you walk into a pizza place? You are either counting, or you're not and only you and the secretary will see that number come next weeks weigh in. Even that doesn't mean that next week or tomorrow cant be better and none of this means pizza was a bad choice. It really depends on the choices that follow. It's all up to you, and to me. I'm choosing to track my food better this week. Not because I only lost .2lbs, but because if I can lose when I'm half good, I know I can do better when I go all in.

Anyway, today has been a rather long day and I'm feeling a little overstimulated and stressed so I am going to clean up my house a bit and then watch a movie I rented from Redbox: Shark Night. Have I mentioned I love bad horror movies?

Good night guys!