The Journey So Far...

The Journey So Far...

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Day 18

This is a picture of one of my diet buddies Molly and myself at age 19. Yep, 7 years ago sitting in a Pizzeria Uno's in Towson MD, waiting for a movie to start. This was taken back when we both still used public transportation to get everywhere. I have known her since I was 4 years old.

I think that having people around who support you and care about your well being and your progress without judging you for your mistakes is very important. I think that without it, you are working sort of handicapped. I am grateful for everything I gain from them, whether it be a lesson learned, or a hand on my back when I stumble. I really hope that they feel they gain as much from me as I do from them.

Do you have a support group, or circle in your life (online counts!)?

I have decided that I am going to do this come hell or high water. I am not giving up, ever again. I still feel unsteady, but it isn't not knowing if I can do it, its being afraid that I wont. Again. I know that I can do this, and I know that I am capable of blowing off those fears. I will, I will, I will! I want too much, and have waited to long to ever start over again. If I could sign my name in blood I would because everyone (who left comments) is right. It is about making a decision for myself to commit to something that will change my life in every way.

Today was much better. I woke up feeling sick, but went to the gym anyway. I did my whole circuit and then after dinner I did another mile on the track (Becky is going to do the track with us when she can!), which puts my mileage for the day at 2 miles plus the strength machines. The best part is that after the gym I felt better than I had in days. I stayed on my points today, and today was easier. I do need to put some soup in the crock pot for my lunches though to up the points. I had two servings of dinner again tonight to reach my points. Not together, a few hours apart, but still. It feels like cheating.

Ashley is coming to the YMCA with me tomorrow morning! Yay! Also, tomorrow is the dreaded Golden Corral. I still have my game plan, and I looked up the points for everything I am going to eat tomorrow. If I can stick to this it will be yet another victory over my diet demons!

1 baked potato: 3pts
1 wedge laughing cow cheese: 2pts
1 serving spinach dip: 1pts
1 serving OJ: 2pts
10 mini rice cakes: 2pts
2/3 Chic Fila SW Chicken Salad: 5pts
1/2 pack salad dressing: 4pts
1 serving tortilla strips: 1pts
1 low fat low cal angel food cake: 1pts
1 tbsp raspberry jam: 1pts
Dinner (counting together):
2 serving chinese pineapple chicken w/cup brown rice: 17pts
1 cup ice cream: 3pts
Total for the Day: 42/44
Leftover: 2

It's getting better, it simply has to.


Rettakat said...

How wonderful to read what you wrote here...the whole spirit of it is different. It sounds strong, determined, and ready to claim that new life for yourself! I am so happy for you!

May I make a suggestion?? This is from my own experience: there are days you FEEL the power and determination, then other days sneak up on you where you do NOT feel it.

That doesn't mean it is is just that we don't FEEL it that day.

What I did was write it out in a short form, and stick it up where you will see your goals and your spunky that on the days when you don't feel it, the REAL YOU--the spunky one that IS SUCCEEDING, will talk to the one that is having a down day.

Sounds sorta schizdoid...LOL! But really, it just reminds you not to listen to the negative feelings, and that pretty soon you will be pumped up again, and that's fun.

You are doing well!

Scarlet Simple said...

I do struggle with those days. I get so sick of the journey that I want to to throw in the towel. That is a great idea. WW hands out a sheet for you to write goals on in that way, and I think I know exactly where to put it! Right on the fridge. So I can see what motivates me even when I feel unmotivated. Its even orange like a dangling carrot!