The Journey So Far...

The Journey So Far...

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Day 58

No cat yet. My friend and her baby are doing better so far though, hopefully they will be out of the hospital by Friday.

I have been dealing with a lot of stress this week and have been too busy to go to the gym. To make matters worse I feel like I twisted my knee somehow the day before yesterday. I'm not sedentary by any means. I am still up and going and going and going and so on.

I had a moment today where I almost let everything go and ran screaming to the nearest buffet. I was sitting there after checking empty cat traps, and listening to my friends daughter (I have been babysitting while she is in the hospital) chatter on about gold fish and I just felt the darkness creeping in. I felt rather blasé and disconnected today. I guess this was a "not feeling it" day Retta? I haven't been sleeping well, and I was hungry too, which made it worse. I felt so weak in the face of this battle today, but I didn't fold. I came in at 6 points under, but I didn't quit, and I didn't give in to my emotional terrorism. I'm trying to get to a point where even when I feel like it doesn't matter, I make the right choice anyway. This point also includes being able to make the wrong choice occasionally and still maintain my weight and my attitude. I want to be happy, healthy and stable.

I have another full day tomorrow. I will make it though! I have been so good and so faithful to myself and this journey, I just need to keep my eyes on the prize (my life) and enjoy the mini benefits (NSV's) along the way. I want this so badly, and I know I can keep this up, I need to keep this up. So I will.

Today:
Oatmeal: 2
blueberries: 1
1/8th cup skim milk: 1
4 french fries: 1
1 huge salad all green: 0
1/8th cup chick peas: 1
1 serving dressing: 2
1 serving bbq soy crisps: 2
1 can soup: 5
1 serving cheese: 2
2 mini ww cheese steaks: 8
1 serving potatoes au gratin: 4
2 servings spicy sw mustard: 3
1 serving jam: 1
1/2 serving nutella: 2
1 light angel food cake: 1
1 serving ice cream: 2
Total for the Day: 38/44
Leftover: 6/44

I am under, but like I said, I'm still here and I didn't eat the wrong things. Every single day is another step forward and another inch won back. This is it.

3 comments:

{ALL} for a Better Life said...

Oh yes, I know all about those dark days. You did great though and you are still doing the right things. Try not to allow the stress to over take too much.

Patsy said...

Poor you... I'm sorry the kitty hasn't returned yet, but I'm glad your friend's daughter is getting better.

Hope things are MUCH less stressful for you soon. Well done with not overeating to 'cope' with it all.

Rettakat said...

Oh, I'm sorry it was a hard day. You mentioned not sleeping well... I was thinking about that. Because so many times these harder days come on the heels of poor sleep. Sometimes it takes me a while to connect the dots, but I'd say it set us both up for a hard day, this lack of quality sleep. And yet you handled it well. :-)

I hope you feel better quick!
Loretta
=^..^=