Day 28

Today was really hard in more than one way. I've been feeling all moody and depressed. I didn't sleep well last night, I tossed and turned for hours and I ended up keeping Chad awake too long too. I was just an anxious about bills, plans, roommates and food. Lately everything has been really hard for me. So much so that I finally made the call to see a therapist. I have an appointment on August 13th. I think (as long as the insurance and everything goes well) that this could be a huge piece of the whole puzzle for me. I am pretty sure I have depression, and I would not be surprised to find out that I have some sort of anxiety disorder.

In any case, all I wanted to do today was sit in the dark with the TV on Syfy channel and eat. I did not do that though. I worked on my coupons, cleaned up the house, and made dinner. I ate too much today but that't not too bad of a thing considering I have weekly points for moments of weakness. I only used 9 of them.

I'm not hungry, but I do feel the need to self soothe, which I equate involuntarily with food. I've been coping but today I slipped a little. I was also going to start adding Tuesday nights into my gym routine but that will have to wait until next week. I'm exhausted. I know I have been saying that a lot lately, but I am.

Years ago, when I first started this blog, one of the tearful conversations I had with my husband involved me explaining to him that if I went to the gym that would be pretty much it for the day for me. I was way out of shape and over 400 pounds. This time around funnily (not) enough I am heavier than I was but still in better shape. Its weird, but its true. I mean better shape is relative when you struggle to do 20 minutes of cardio but back when I started at a lower weight I could barely do ten. Anyway my point is that though I am able to do more than just the gym these days I am still feeling incredibly spent sometimes. Okay, a lot of the time.

Anyway, onward march and all that jazz. The diet parade waits for no one.

Food:

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Morning
1/4 cup(s) unsweetened dill pickle(s)	0
1  slice(s) American cheese	3
1 1/2 oz turkey breast lunch meat (3-1/2" square)	1
1  roll Arnold Sandwich Thins	3
1  tbsp Kraft Mayo	1
Subtotal	8
Midday
1  serving(s) Aldi Cracker Crisps	3
2  serving(s) chicken and rice soup	6
1  container Muller Yogurt	4
Subtotal	13
Evening
1  serving(s) Cooks Perfect Turkey Meatballs	4
3  serving(s) Buitoni Angel Hair (80g)	18
1  serving(s) Aldi Cracker Crisps	3
1 1/2 Average Pasta Sauce #4	7
Subtotal	32
Anytime
1  slice(s) American cheese	3
1  serving(s) Aldi Cracker Crisps	3
4  Tbsp fat free salsa	0
2  serving(s) Ben and Jerrys Raspberry brownie frozen yogurt	11
2  cup Campbell's Soup	5
Subtotal	22
Food PointsPlus values total used	75
Food PointsPlus values remaining	0
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity PointsPlus values earned	0